Jared M. Good Home for Wayward Ruggers

It's been a little while. The week at the shore ended spectacularly, with Dan "Sea Mammal" Shaw and me going Kayaking in the ocean. Ten-year-old Krista repeatedly reported to us that Dan "sucks" (her words, not mine) at paddling. I thought this would only be semi true...however, it was very true. We were kayaking for 3 hours, a trip that I think I could have made in 1 given the amount of time I spent paddling back out to Dan in order to make sure that his progress was sufficient enough not to warrant his mom calling the coast guard to come get us.

We saw a pod of dolphins. I hoped they were friendly, but not too friendly, as I think they would have flipped my unsteady kayak if they jumped over it. Dan said he never felt so close to his kin.

Then I went to Alexandria for a weekend with Muhammad Aubri, who does not approve of that nickname. Probably the first time I can report being happy and care free in a long time.

In other news, the UCR team was kicked off campus for preseason due to partying on the first night, so Huggy has taken up an internship at the Jared M. Good home for Wayward Ruggers. We've been running 1-2 miles every night, plus walking about another, so he is somewhat in training. Not only will he be ready for rugby matches, but also for drinking Pabst and sleeping on a sofa.

Dan's Mom's Misconceptions

Dan went for a jog today, he was gone for about two hours, causing some concern for his well being, as Dan's mom claimed that Dan had "not run in two months" and "weighs almost as much as me." We had to inform her that Dan had not run in what was closer to two years, and had, in fact, probably surpassed her in weight in the mid 90s.

She called the hospital to see if they had admitted anyone wearing a yellow nascar bandana. However, we felt certain that he would not be at the hospital, as the hospital does not serve icecream.

Apparently, his jog included someone yelling "hustle fatass!"

one fish, two fish, red fish, SHARK!

So I was swimming yesterday, if you want to call it that, as we're by the bay (no watermelons growing from what I can tell) and the water is fairly shallow. Anyways, we're out there and I felt something large brush against both my legs, I could feel it had some girth to it, and it was obviously big enough to span my stance. and it was kinda warm.

then today some guy in a boat told Berber that they had seen a shark, so maybe one touched me.

Kristin: "touched by a shark" sounds like an awesome TV show.
Goody: yeah, but it wouldn't be. It would just me giving dan a scared look, realizing he's too far away to touch me with his leg and going "something just touched me. something big." and rapidly exiting the water and peering back at it looking for a fin for 45 minutes.

this and that

nothing too spectacular. Slept till noon, rested my sunburn today, I have a nice stripe on me where I fell asleep yesterday morning with my arms folded on my stomach. I'll see if I can get a pic.

Last night we went to rehobeth.
Goody: "Dude, seriously, what were you thinking when you put on that fucking straight brimmed hat and plaid shorts, were you trying to look as douchey as possible?"
Random Kid: "You're wearing a vest."

Alex Morra should be coming down to add to the excitement tonight. We're building a fire in celebration, and perhaps sacrificing the contents of Jenna's stomach if all goes well, despite the memorandum prohibiting vomiting posted momma Shaw.

Goody: "I hope everyone on this beach understands that it's perfectly fine to take a leak in public just so long as you take a knee..."
Dan: "I'd be more worried about the people on the ferry"
Goody: "You were there when the girls I coach were shocked by a guy pissing at the tourney?"
Dan: "yeah, although a rugby field is the only place before today that I saw someone do that, although you are wearing rugby shorts."
Goody: "I think rugby shorts are key to the process."
Dan: "I think a lack of shame and a lack of a need for privacy are key to the process."
Goody: "and 5 beers."

After a bought of drinking Berber made it the worst brother's day ever by fighting with his brother. Dan responded by sleeping till 1, and then deciding to go get something to eat.

Due to the snoring involved with this choice of action, I went and slept on the beach from nine to noon and am now somewhat burned.

Danny Dan: Tomorrow is going to be the best brother's day ever.
Berber: I don't know if I can drink tomorrow
Danny Dan: What's tomorrow?
Berber: ....Brother's day....

ALSO: in what was by far THE most spectacular event I have ever witnessed, Krista, age 10, after being thrown by Dan into the ocean multiple times while she was clinging to him for security, blow a massive load of clear, yet gooey, snot onto the back of Dan's neck.